Sunday, June 16, 2013

6 months 2800 miles and a kroger in stone mountain Georgia (an update)

6 months ago today I was beginning my first full day of my time  in Atlanta Georgia and was fully anticipating starting work at a restaurant in Grayson Georgia and staying as far away from those "dang dream center people" as possible. I had also the previous morning  left a significant portion of my heart with a man who I had no intention of liking when we met  because "nice Christian boys don’t like me and besides he dresses like a sherpa" but like a blue eyed bearded freight train he had stolen my heart with belly laughs , mary poppins and first kisses on the 3rd try. We had left things "not officially together but we will see what happens" and I was conflicted but trying to protect my battered heart and consumed with my own insecurity. So here I was in Georgia  after a disappointing morning of discovering that my dream externship may not work out after all.  My friend and I were in a kroger getting stuff for dinner when I texted him a simple "hey I have a question for you, will you be my boyfriend in real life?"  to which I believe he replied "OH HELL YES"  and it was official.  As the days progressed more and more doors shut on my dream externship I felt the Lord pull my angry rebellious heart toward those “dang dream center kids” and on a friday visit downtown someone pitched the idea of doing my externship at the Atlanta dream center feeding the 120 staff ,ministry students and interns as well the 900  people expected on misson trips in the next few months. I agreed thinking “well I can get my time done and get home to my boo” and didn’t expect the transforming, healing and life changing journey that it turned into. During my time at the dream center  I cooked  countless meals and prayed a lot of “dear captain please make these donated (insert random food item) taste ok ) . the really unexpected parts came in two separate experiences that will forever change my life. The first began one Sunday as I was leaving church and Patrick Palmer asked me if I wanted to cook for a mission trip to new Orleans during super bowl week to do anti human trafficking outreach and awareness. I had always wanted to go to NOLA and quickly agreed having no idea that I would come back completely transformed.  On the drive to NOLA I started reading a book I had grabbed rather last minute off my roommates shelf it happened to be a book based on the Book of Hosea and as I read it the Lord began to speak my worth to me and how he had time and time again rescued from the pit even after I had gone running back. He had “bought me out of slavery” and into freedom. I was broken with this new awareness of Grace and resolved to get as much freedom from this trip as I could. We had so many experiences ministering to girls in the clubs on bourbon  street and handing out note cards to people attending superbowl but one in particular will be with me forever. One evening I volunteered to go on a prayer drive because I was completely exhausted but didn’t want to miss out on the outreach we were doing. As we prayed in the van for the girls in the clubs and hotels we were passing the Lord began to show me specific relationships and instances in my life before Him where  I had come so close to being one of the girls that we had pictures of because they were missing and suspected as being “trafficked” I began to weep in the van as I was healed of deep brokenness and wounds from a season where I had become convinced that I had gone past Grace. I have never felt physically lighter after an encounter with the Lord but that was transforming.
The other experience that I never would have expected was finding and establishing a relationship with my birth mom and siblings, I will never forget the feeling of hearing my moms voice for the first time and knowing more that I have ever known anything in my life that she was my mom. I have a family that has been ravaged by brokenness and addiction but that I have been able to reach out to and love them  in a way I would have never expected. I also experienced a restoration of relationship with my beautiful ATLDCMC family and was healed of some much hurt. I can now proudly say I am one of those “dang dream center kids”
I came home March 19 2013 and waiting for me at the airport was the man that I was previously convinced would never exist in real life. Everyday peter shows me what it is to have a relationship that honors the Lord and protects my heart in a way I never thought possible. He has taught me what it is to simply be in the moment and enjoy the right now. Everytime I look at him I understand Grace and redemption and I am learning how to trust the Lord with him and how to love him with an open hand because he is the Lords and not mine to hold on to.  I also now have two jobs one for a food service contractor for a high tech company and the other cooking at a summer camp. So that should leave everybody caught up on whats new


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